Fantasy Islands!

By Liz Egger     In which I look at the lure of a private nudist paradise. ( From September 2005)

I was watching a television programme the other night that profiled some of the richest people in Britain. One of these, a 23 year old with 6 million pounds in the bank had just brought a large chunk of the Seychelles as a personal investment. Another, the ubiquitous Richard Branson, has the island of Necker as his private kingdom. 

What these two had in common (apart from great wealth), was that they both managed to buy their place in the sun at knock down bargain prices. As they also assured us that there were still plenty of bargains to be had in the private island department, and as a private tropical naturist island would be every naturists dream, I decided to do a little research on your behalf. 

 Here then is The Nude Café guide to buying your own private naturist island. 

You can expect to pay:

Between $10,000 (for a lump of rock off the wetter coast of Scotland) and $40m (estate, buildings, staff, in South Ocean, Bahamas) 

 What to look for:

These days you need something special if you really want to stand out. Properties on the market at the moment include Little Ragged Island in the Bahamas, a huge 700 acre chunk of paradise with over 9km of tropical shoreline and an abundant supply of natural fresh water (seriously expensive at $20,000,000), one in Florida that comes with an international airport, a pearl farming business in Polynesia and Isla de sa Ferradura off Ibiza in the Mediterranean. Advertised as “ an island fit for a king”, this upscale rock boasts,130000 sq ft mansion with all the trimmings, an artificial  cave complex with wide range of additional facilities – beauty centre, a whirlpool, infra-red cabin, solarium, aroma bath, steam-bath, sauna, tropical rain shower, vitamin bar, relaxation corner, etc – its own water taxi, jeeps, sail and power boats and jet-skis, and just in case you run out of champagne you can reach the supermarket on the mainland via a private, specially constructed road bridge. A snip at € 32,990,000.

 Before you buy check out: 

Location (“HOW far off the coast is it?”) Fresh water (you’ll go mad if you drink the salt stuff) Political stability (rich landlords are always first against the wall in a coup d’etat) Chance of house blowing away in tropical storm (Come on. You must have seen “The Wizard of OZ”) 

 Where to buy: 

You can’t go far wrong with the Caribbean, but watch out for volcanoes and creepy crawlies. The Panama coast has the same climate for half the price, but there is the risk of pirates and it’s in an earthquake zone. The South Pacific offers privacy but is a bit too remote. Continental Europe is a good bet, but it’s horrendously expensive and fresh water may be a problem. And don’t get fooled by those agencies that try to tempt you with the romance of an island off Scotland or in an Irish loch: we UK naturists know the British climate far too well to fall for that one!  

Try before you buy:

Maybe you’re wondering whether your own private island is the right choice for you. Why not test the waters by renting one first? Prices vary from $55 per day (Ilha do Pico, Brazil, 36 acres and 2 fully equipped residences) to $22,500 per day (Richard Branson’s Neker Island, where the staff outnumber the guests and you’ll be walking in the footsteps of rock stars and royalty)  

Who to contact: 

Are you SERIOUS? You are? Contact Private Islands Online before the taxman catches up with you.

Better still, if you’ve really got that kind of money, call me and ask me out to dinner; I’ve got this great business idea for a nudist resort on a disused oil rig in the North Sea …  

What if you’re broke? 

Why not buy an inflatable island? The Inflatable Private Island, just $299.95 from Hammacher Schlemmer has room for 8 adults and can be extended as your needs (and your fortune) grows. When deflated it’s designed to fit in the boot of your car or your boat cabinet so you can actually transport it and enjoy your own nudist island wherever you like. Not a bad idea, but it doesn’t beat the real thing - the Bahamas have never had a puncture. 

'Til next time,

Liz

Related links:

(This article may not be published or otherwise used without the written consent of the author.)
Back to top