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How Good A Nudist Are You?

Take this tongue-in-cheek test to see how good a nudist you are. Remember that it's just for fun, so don't worry about anyone else seeing your results. They're for your eyes only!

  1. When you come out of the bath or shower, do you. 


    2. Get dressed immediately
    Stay naked for as long as possible
    Never take a bath or shower
    I'm bored already. I'm off.

  2. You’re watching a movie at home, in which your favourite actor / actress does an unexpected and unnecessary nude scene. Do you


    3. Switch off in disgust.
    Remark that the use of unnecessary nudity denotes a lack of artistic integrity. Good body though.
    Notice that the nude one has surplus cellulite / sagging bottom just like you, and feel better about yourself
    Exclaim ” Holy Mackerel” and replay the scene over again, possibly recording it for later "research".

  3. Non-nudist friends who are unaware that you are a nudist are browsing through your holiday photo album. You remember that the next section contains nude snaps of you at Cap d'Agde. Do you;


    4. Panic and snatch the album away, hastily apologise for boring them, and pour more drinks all round
    Distract their attention by falling down feigning a heart attack.
    Happily allow them to peruse the nude pictures whilst you present a well-reasoned and compelling case in favour of nudism.
    Who cares? Wait until you show them the snaps of you and your gay lover at the Pink Pussy Cat SaunaBar in Bankok.

  4. You visit a busy clothes optional beach. No one is naked - everyone is wearing at least a bathing suit. Do you:


    5. Keep your kit on until a few others get naked first
    Strip off anyway, blissfully unconcerned that you are the only nude person there.
    Return home immediately and dash off a letter to your National Naturist Association complaining about textiles on nudist beaches.
    Stow your camera and telescopic lens back in the car, and hope for some better peep pics at another nudist beach

  5. You are applying for a job. The application form asks for details of your hobbies and leisure activities. Do you:


    6. Answer truthfully, but omit to mention your nudism on the grounds that it might ruin your chances and anyway what they don’t know won’t hurt them.

     


    Proudly note “nudism” as your hobby. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, and if it costs you the job…well who wants to work for such narrow-minded bigots anyway. Might even be able to sue on the grounds of discrimination…

     


    Apply for a job? Me? Are you serious?


  6. Whilst visiting the home of an attractive member of the opposite sex you are left alone for a while.  You “accidentally” open a drawer and find photos of your host, stark naked on a nudist beach. You had no idea that this person was a nudist. Do you: 


    7. Put the photos straight back and say no more about it.
    Have a good look first, and then put them back, saying no more about it.
    Rejoice that you’ve discovered another fellow nudist, and at the first opportunity steer the conversation

    round to naturism and your interest in it, hoping that you may be able to share its pleasures together. 


    Steal the photos, hoping either to blackmail the target into bed or to sell them for a good profit on the internet.

  7. A TV company asks your local naturist club for volunteers to appear in a forthcoming documentary about nudists. Do you;


    8. Agree to be interviewed anonymously but not filmed.
    Absolutely refuse to have anything to do with the filming
    Happily agree to be filmed naked and interviewed on camera, on condition that you have an opportunity to explain the joys of naturism to the viewers.

     


    Secretly contact the television company and offer – for a reasonable fee – to tell them about the club treasurer and Mrs O’Rourke, and the real reason for her “holiday” in Bournemouth.

  8. There has been a break in at your naturist club, and valuable power tools have gone missing. The police are called, and arrive as you are sunbathing naked on the lawn. Do you:


    9. Get dressed whilst they are on the premises.
    Cover yourself with a towel or sarong to spare their blushes, but otherwise stay unclothed.
    Remain unashamedly naked whilst they carry out their investigations.
    Slip out the back gate and hope they don't find your fingerprints on the tool shed door.

    Once you've answered the questions, click on the "grade me" button below to see your score, then click "Give me more" to read your assessment!

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